Yessss! It came together so well! My favorite thing about your writing is how quickly you get drawn into the scene. You don't do too much exposition, but you've got just enough to let the reader picture it for themselves. Great work!
Thank you! I intentionally wrote the scene setting in omniscient for that purpose, I was hoping the switch back to Thrain/Adalyn limited was not too jarring. Glad you enjoyed it
Adalyn will be an increasingly important character going forwards, so from that I feel like it could be a good thing to leave it.
On the other hand, it’s a bit atypical, and could leave the reader feeling like they’ve “seen the author” in the writing, rather than feeling engrossed in the narrative.
Honestly? I think it would flow best with the first part starting with Thrain's perspective then shifting to Adalyn's (great name btw) for the interrogation scene. We get both without you having to repeat anything.
I do feel it should be her, because it sheds a new light on Thrain, and we learn about Adalyn without it being an info dump. Especially with her being an important character.
Are you planning to have her in more POVs in the future (even if it is scarce)? If you are, then this is the perfect introduction. If not, then I would agree, it doesn't make sense.
I am all for shifting POVs (non-biased of course), and I think it works here really well.
Yessss! It came together so well! My favorite thing about your writing is how quickly you get drawn into the scene. You don't do too much exposition, but you've got just enough to let the reader picture it for themselves. Great work!
Thank you! I intentionally wrote the scene setting in omniscient for that purpose, I was hoping the switch back to Thrain/Adalyn limited was not too jarring. Glad you enjoyed it
It took me like 2 seconds to figure it out but once I did, I was pretty happy for it. I love when a scene is told from multiple perspectives!
I loved this chapter; she is my second favorite now (obviously the horse is still #1).
When you go for the next draft, are you planning of have both accounts of the same scene or are you going to choose?
Well I’m curious how you felt reading it.
Adalyn will be an increasingly important character going forwards, so from that I feel like it could be a good thing to leave it.
On the other hand, it’s a bit atypical, and could leave the reader feeling like they’ve “seen the author” in the writing, rather than feeling engrossed in the narrative.
Honestly? I think it would flow best with the first part starting with Thrain's perspective then shifting to Adalyn's (great name btw) for the interrogation scene. We get both without you having to repeat anything.
I do feel it should be her, because it sheds a new light on Thrain, and we learn about Adalyn without it being an info dump. Especially with her being an important character.
Are you planning to have her in more POVs in the future (even if it is scarce)? If you are, then this is the perfect introduction. If not, then I would agree, it doesn't make sense.
I am all for shifting POVs (non-biased of course), and I think it works here really well.
Sweet! Yes, she will eventually occupy the same amount of POV space as the others.
Had not considered a switch halfway through! That’s an idea, I’ll play around with that
I think it would be a really good transition and introduction!! I like her a lot.